Dharma Crumbs

Brown giving ‘good oral’…

Poor Gordy. His advisers keep trying to help him overcome his ‘media deficient’ personality by coming up with off the wall ideas to make us love him. The spineless sucker feels obliged to go along with them. He probably realises he’ll be history if he doesn’t, but to anyone who saw his excruciating appearance on ’American Idol’, it’s clear he’ll demean himself in any way deemed necessary by the spinmeisters in his desperation to cling to his ill-gotten power.

spinmeisters want to make-over brown’s bogeyman image…

His Idol appearance - where he gave millions of tax payers money in a cynical publicity stunt that misfired - reminded me of that other stellar Labour leader’s blunder… Michael Foot wearing what looked like an old donkey jacket while laying a wreath at the Cenotaph. Gordy craves to be as popular as unelectable ‘Oxbridge-working-class-hero’ Footy, but has some way to go.

His latest attempt at trying to join the human race involves answering letters from ordinary Joe’s like you and me. Nothing unusual in that. Except he is doing it by telephone to create “good word of mouth” according to his top strategist…

In truly spontaneous Labourite fashion, voter correspondence is scrutinised for content/relevance/gullibility/ethnicity/degree of difficulty/political correctness/Tory bashing potential, then picked ‘at random’ before a team of highly paid no-nothing flunkies formulate an anodyne response for the sub-Prime Minister to mouth at some startled citizen.

Rumour has it that he once called someone at 6am to prove he works as hard as Thatcher, but his aides have reined him in to avoid giving a mixed message, aiming for a ’man-of-the-people’ spin rather than the ‘lofty-workaholic-miserable-killjoy-ineffectual-git’ reality he is better known for.

Off the record an anonymous number 10 kingmaker said, “Poor love, he really can’t give good oral… He just finds it so difficult talking to ordinary humans as it is; trying to prove a point at the same time as communicating platitudes really is beyond his limited interpersonal skills. Now where’s Miliband’s number..?”

In a shocking example of an ‘off message’ moment and an apparent U-turn in government policy, Brown has apologised to the Iraqi citizens for Blair’s war crimes. Apparently Mr Rafique, a voter picked ‘at random’, said the PM chatted through his letter and “apologised on behalf of the Labour government for what had happened to the people of Iraq”. 

Mr Rafique made no comment but was described as feeling ‘all warm and fuzzy.’ He is obviously not a Labour voter.

Brown also assured Rafique he will “give his full concentration” to withdrawing our troops. A previously sycophanitc senior-number-10-loyal-insider expressed concern at the comment and blurted, “I wish he wouldn’t try to think on his feet. He should stick to the script. Now some idiot blogger will end up pointing out the obvious: ’So Brown won’t be able to think of anything else until the troops are out then, will he? Good.’ Poor Gordon. If only Tony had banned all free speech like I suggested we wouldn’t have this problem…’ He scuttled off murmuring, “Now, where did I put David Miliband’s number?”

Rumor Has It… - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Rumor Has It… (also known as Rumour Has It… in the UK , Ireland , Canada and Australia ) is a 2005 comedy film . It stars Jennifer Aniston and Kevin Costner and is directed by Rob Reiner . It was released in North America on December 25 , 2005 . … Plot · Cast · Soundtrack

Meanwhile twenty-seven million Iraqi citizens remain unaware of the apology.

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Leadership ‘Oddities’: Darling 100/1, Clarke 50/1, Hoon 20/1, Balls 4/1,Milliband 3/1, Cherie Booth-Hillary-Blair 1/10 odds on fav

Rumour Has It (song) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Rumour Has It" is a single by Donna Summer released in 1978 . It was a reasonable sized hit for the queen of disco , making the Top 20 in the UK. The song was originally featured on Summer’s Once Upon a Time album, a concept album that tells the "fairytale" story of a girl who goes from rags to riches.

YouGov poll: Labour 23% - only 24 points behind the Conservatives on 47%. The Liberal Democrats - irrelevant.

news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/politics/7427297.stm

Rumor Has It DVD site
Rumor Has It Kennels Website

 

 

 

Related posts: The open university

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